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  • THE GREAT BISCUIT REVIEW !!!

    Discussion in 'General Chat' started by vijugati8g, May 31, 2012.

    1. vijugati8g

      vijugati8g Well-Known Member

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      Wagon wheels.

      WAG WH.jpg

      Wagon wheels create an instant sense of nostalgia, and yearning for days gone by, in all seasoned biscuit fans, due to the fact that they used to be bigger, much bigger, and thicker. The reduction in size of the Wagon wheel maybe due to our childhood memories recalling a biscuit that was relatively larger compared to us. However, this phenomena does not occur with other large diameter biscuits such as the digestive, so we are left to wonder at the reasons for a mysterious plot to reduce their size. They also used to come in boxes of four with a brown plastic tray thing keeping them in order.

      There is much to commend the Wagon Wheel, its chocolate flavoured coating, now what's that all about? It gives Wagon Wheels a strange grey vinyl silk sheen, and forms a tortured mass of ripplely bumps on the surface, almost like its not meant to be there at all and has managed to adhere to the surface despite the odds. As for what it tastes like compared to chocolate, who knows? there isn't enough of it to make an informed opinion.

      Now on the marshmallow center, what do we know of that? Well it is believed to contain the Wagon Wheels small quantity of gelatin, a useful fact if you want to ward off any vegetarians who are making advances to your biscuits. Other than that it would seem that its main role is to provide an interesting structural layer, allowing both biscuit layers a degree of independent horizontal movement once the flimsy chocolate seal has been compromised. As for what it tastes like again, I doubt if any body knows for sure.

      And finally the two biscuit layers themselves. Well your guess is as good as mine, as to what is happening there. They seem to be a bit like an ultra thin shortcake biscuit that has gone stale. Maybe.

      However, put all of these odd things together, as Burton's have, and you get the compelling whole that is the Wagon Wheel. Apparently according to the pack this is "A taste for adventure".

      THE GARIBALDI
      A complete one off, the Garibaldi biscuit is unlike any other, and as such commands a unique position in the biscuit world.
      Where do I begin, its got more currents in it than even a fruit shortcake. They come in big slabs with little marks where you are supposed to break them up. Its almost like they are shipping in kit form, and it requires a little extra bit of engagement from the biscuit eater.
      BISCUIT.jpg

      They seem somehow flatter than other biscuits and their glaze gives them a high specular index.

      Affectionately known as dead fly biscuits, yet again the sheer fact they have a nick name marks them out from their other biscuit brethren.

      Please feel free to add !!
       
    2. fa2nzg

      fa2nzg Well-Known Member

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      THE GREAT BISCUIT REVIEW !!!

      Review chocolate hobnobs please
       
    3. defelqy

      defelqy Well-Known Member

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      THE GREAT BISCUIT REVIEW !!!

      I used to like Jaffa Cakes until i found out the "smashingly orangey bit" is actually the collective ear wax from the McVitie family.
       
    4. herunder88

      herunder88 Well-Known Member

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      THE GREAT BISCUIT REVIEW !!!

      not a biscuit or is it ?
       
    5. Korporalegq

      Korporalegq Well-Known Member

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      THE GREAT BISCUIT REVIEW !!!

      That's rank
       
    6. masoven4u

      masoven4u Well-Known Member

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      THE GREAT BISCUIT REVIEW !!!

      well that has had the biscuit world up in arms and hot debate about for many years - NOT REALLY !!!!- its sort of in the name you see
      Jaffa Cakes

      a close relative though !!
       
    7. Capone

      Capone Well-Known Member

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      THE GREAT BISCUIT REVIEW !!!

      Lol the royal marine of the biscuit world
       
    8. jailynn24hb

      jailynn24hb Well-Known Member

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      THE GREAT BISCUIT REVIEW !!!

      Please start a cake thread.... ;-)
       
    9. vijugati8g

      vijugati8g Well-Known Member

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      THE GREAT BISCUIT REVIEW !!!

      the tunnocks carmel waffer is the fuking daddy
       
    10. Korporalegq

      Korporalegq Well-Known Member

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      THE GREAT BISCUIT REVIEW !!!

      chocolate hob nobs are the crack cocaine of the biscuit barrel tho
       

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